For many centuries
My color despised
My impelled abused
My beliefs mocked
My existence disregarded
My creation held in contempt
I, intimidated
And forcefully converted
As if god was wrong to have created me black.
I. have discarded myself
Our cultures
Our traditions
Our beliefs
Our everything
I am no more, I have no pride!
I talk like an Arab
Dress like an Arab
Smile like an Arab
Walk like an Arab
Laugh like an Arab
Sing like an Arab
Dance like an Arab
Eat like an Arab
Sleep like an Arab
Dream like an Arab
Behave like an Arab
Pray like an Arab
Lie like an Arab
I think I am Arab
I am a black Arab
Induced by despise
Abuse and disregard
So, I sought acceptance
Admittance.
A second class citizen
No
A third class citizen
No
The invisible voice
Kept saying
I mistakenly persuaded
To believe that to alleviate
My status to status of respect
And worth,
I have to think
And believe
I am a back Arab!
But not an Arab!
All in vain
Despite discarding
My old self
And changing
My ego
I am still rejected
Despised mocked
Disregarded and abused
Ya abide
Ya haiwan
Ya kelab
Ya homaar
Ya afew
Ya weyaid
How can we co-exist?
It is our land
They want to grab
The invisible voice said
It is your potential
Resources
They want to loot
Don’t you know?
You fool.
They invisible voice advised.
So doubt pretend he continued
Call a spade a spade
If you are really an Arab
Be an Arab.
If you are African.
Be proud of being an African.
That is the creation of God all mighty,
Men cannot change nature (Biology)
The invisible voice said
Many years later
I re-discovered
My old self and found that
Was converted into a central slave
And being taken for a joy ride.
Then in dreams I remembered
The ancestral message.
“And you shall always remain one to protect and further your ancestral heritage and beliefs of your society and shall not succumb to external ways that will bury you for good the memory of your ancestors and cultural continuity”
I am a black Arab roaming the world seeking for peace.
Peace of mind and to heal my wounded heart.
Latio Lo’Jaden
20/1/1994
Nairobi
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